I was invited on a friends channel with this vid, and I'm here to teach you all the wonderful skill of how to be a pervert in Japan.
I also wanted to share a few pics I had to take down from my video because of some copyright issues with YouTube. They're such Prima-donnas...
Notice how this kind of thing is BIG news in America. "How unheard of!" they say. In Japan, this guy could be your neighbor, your friend, or your Sunday school teacher... all at the same time. No big deal...
Reading the comments on the video, no one could believe that this stuff actually happens and the girls don't do anything about it, or the chikan. What's even more surprising is that the other guys on the train, watching the chikan, don't even do anything! If this kind of thing went down in America, EVERYONE would get up and beat the shit out of this chikan guy. Crazy...
The chikan theme is also very popular in porn... that's what I've "heard" of course...
I read an amazing figure the other day! 1.4 million people in Japan, in other words, 2% of Japan's POPULATION go to a love hotel EVERYDAY! That's some big business...
Check out the bottom left room, chikan training room...
This one's my personal favorite, I tell my girlfriend to act more like a maid cafe waitress everyday, still can't figure out why it's not working... Maybe she needs the uniform...
How’s it going? My name's Ken Cannon and at the slight risk of never being invited to appear on Victor’s channel again, I’m gonna be talking to you about how to be a pervert in Japan.
Many of you may have heard the generalization that “Japan is a country of perverts!” And well I’m here to tell you that it's true! But I’m also here to tell you that so is every country in the world. Japan just has some particularly interesting ways of being perverted.
(Peeping toms are so yesterday.)
So without further ado, I bring you 1st way to be a pervert in Japan.
And that is, shitagi dorobo! Literally panty thief.
(pronunciation guide)
Ok so shitagi means underwear, but more specifically, women’s underwear. It used to be used to refer to the undershirt of a samurai, you find the connection,
and dorobo simply means thief.
Now surprisingly this act is pretty common in Japan.
itikimasu
Anata, doko ni iku no?
A, shitagi dorobo ni iku
Ah so, kiosukete nee
Hai~
Kyaaa! Dare!, kimaten desho.. shitagi dorobo.
Ah!!.. ah sou ka…
So how this works, a male typically sneaks into the house of an adult woman, walks past the expensive stereo system, her thousands of dollars of jewelry to find her dresser, steal her underwear…. And then walk back past the expensive jewelry, her fancy stereo system... and leaves
What they do with the underwear after is a little beyond the scope of this lesson…
*drinking coffee*
Oh hey do you have any napkins??
Yeah here ya go..
*hands him a panty*
Alright! On to how to be a pervert in Japan Tactic 2!
Chikan!
Now this is one you might have heard of if you’ve ever riding a train in Japan, or maybe you’re even more familiar with it than I think…
Anywho, chikan means molester but is more commonly used to refer train groper.
(Pronunciation guide)
Now as I said this term is mostly used to refer to train gropers. Now what that more specifically means is that a man will get on a train look for a nice obedient looking gropee, and go to work!
*Awkard grope*
*giant sheman turns around*
*ah…*
Now as many of you potential chikans may be saying, well, “I tried that one day on the train and I got groped back with a giant kick in the balls”
The thing is that is in Japan women, and most men as well, don’t like to cause trouble so they typically don’t say anything.
*awkard grope*
*giant she man looks up and just shrugs*
*hehehehe*
Apparently this problem is actually so prevelant in Japan that they have recently created girls only trains.
*Bajillions of giant shemales board train*
OK, now what if you’re just a regular old pervert like the rest of us and just want a place you can go to fulfill all your pervy needs. Well Japan has just the places for you. 2 in fact!
Number 1 pervy place.
rabu hoteru, literally “love hotel”
(Pronunciation guide)
Now love hotels are something that occur in a few other countries as well, even America has a no tell motel? But never has a country perfected this art as much as Japan.
Now I say art, because well there's really no other word to describe the inside of these rooms, besides monstrosity of course. In general they range from Hello Kitty heart covered dungeons to underwater racetracks for Martians…
Ahh kawaaii! Nani sore??
Oh omiyage
Hee omiyage ne, doko kara?
Ahh,, ettoo…. Roshia?
So what you do when you wanna get yourself a hotel full of love is you find these rather discrete apartment looking places, go in pay the person behind the frosted glass for a “rest” period ranging anywhere from 1 to 3 hours, denpending on your stamina, and enjoy =)
Ok! Were at my place now! =D heheh…
Is this really your apartment?
Sou yo..
Why does it say “Hotpassion” there…?
Oh well, you know, I’m from America, we have strange last names… don’t worry, come lets go…
OK and the 2nd pervy place and the last concept/word for this video is..
Meido kafe, in english, maid café!
(pronunciation guide)
Maid cafes are essentially otaku fantasy centered cafés where all of the waitresses dress up in French maid uniforms and treat their customers like masters.
In fact instead of hello, or hi, they greet all of their customers with a friendly, okaerinasaimase, goshujin-sama!
(Pictures of maid cafes)
The menus of maid cafés are usually the same as most café’s but with the twist of everything being cutified. i.e smilley face omlettes ect.
Maid delivers omlets
I look down with a surprised awkward look.
And the omelet has a picture of victor on it.
Other typical courtesies of maid cafes are, spoon feeding, neck massages, and even ear cleanings (clips of me getting these things)
To recap, how to be a pervert in Japan step 1.
Steal some panties.
Step 2.
Grab some train booty.
Step 3.
Get some love at a hotel.
And Step 4
Go get your ears cleaned.
Alright I just want to thank Victor for letting me appear on his channel, probably for the last time. And most of all, you, the potential pervert, for making our world a better place.
Laters
Disclaimer : Ken Cannon should never be listened to at any time, for any reason, what so ever. Please do not become a pervert, or go to japan… ever… thank you.
Ken Cannon